Sunday, 26 August 2012


“Hey you; lovely avatar” It wasn’t exactly a ghen ghen avatar, it was probably because of the push-ups I wore, (Boob-vatar LOL). I smiled so hard as I hurriedly clicked on his Twitter profile on my Blackberry Curve2, I enlarged his avatar; My goodness, he was cute, wearing a winter jacket, a head warmer and holding a Brown paper bag in front of a store. My heart raced, I followed him back immediately and quickly replied his tweet at me, patiently waiting to get a Yellow bar on my DM icon.

I really don’t stay long on twitter but that day, I made sure I ‘LOL-ed’ most of his tweets to get his attention. It was to no avail. You know as these ‘twitter celebs’ tweet about thirsty girls, I was too shy to DM him first. Infact, I stalked him on facebook; went through all the Jides, I found him, added him as a friend, liked all his photos and commented on a few.
Facebook was slowing the P, I went back to twitter.
After weeks of tweeting at this guy, I tweeted this one day “I really want you, aint it obvious” he LOL-ed the tweet, “OMG!!!!” I stared at my phone in amusement, “He finally replies me” I really was too happy, I made that tweet a favorite. I looked at my DM icon again waiting for a Yellow bar, but none :( .
One Sunday in church, my pastor made this statement during sermon “if you want something, fight for it” I quoted it out of context, I then boldly sent a DM to Jide. I was cold. I typed “Hello” I discarded it, typed “why did you LOL my tweet that day” I discarded it, also typed “Hello I love your tweets” discarded it also. I was mad at myself.
I never copied notes in class, I was always on Jide’s timeline, LOL-ing his tweets. My bad; I Forgot to add, I’m a student and I attend Babcock University. I failed my CA test one day because I was busy LOL-ing Jides tweets when my lecturer was in class. Infact it was because I was ‘pressing phone’ he gave the class an impromptu test out of annoyance. I didn’t care at least it was better than seizing my phone.
March 31st 2012, 11:43pm. I got a yellow bar on my DM icon.
“Hey Do my tweets make you laugh all the time? :/”. It was from Jide!!!!!!! “Finally” I screamed like a thirsty hoe. I replied “LOL, Yes. How are you, why are you still awake” then he replied me “its 6:50pm here and I’m working”
 I calmed myself down after reading that, I really didn’t know what to say again, infact I was almost thanking him for DM-ing me. Then I replied with my Cliche “LOL”
Jide and I became good Twitter buddies, I was much comfortable to DM him to say Hi, but he never DM-ed first. I wanted his BB pin….-___- See the format I used………..
 DM to Jide: “Heyyyy, I think my Cousin Knows you, I showed him your avatar, but he’s not too sure, pls can I have ur pin so we can talk better”
We started getting close on bbm, exchanged numbers, but he really didn’t open up to me as much I did. I didn’t mind. He came to Nigeria and I hurriedly picked a date for us to meet. He came to see me in my friends hostel in Unilag on a saturday, I came to Lagos from school the day before. It was a friday and it was all because of him.
“I’m downstairs” he said to me over the phone, I smiled nervously at my friend Desola as I replied “Okay, I’m coming”
His car was a red Mercedes C300.
“So can we go to my place” He asked as we earlier talked about so many things, laughed and had little fun. I didn’t want him to think I’m some cheap twitter girl tho, so I made sure I stammered before I answered; “that’s if you’ll bring me back here before 12″
We got to his house at Magodo. Very nice house, he told me he built it himself and stays alone. I REALLY WANTED TO DATE THIS GUY, I was tired of Babcock guys.
It became a habit. My bad habit. Leaving school on friday, staying at Desola’s hostel in Unilag, hanging out with Jide. He took me out the next weekend to Four Points and dropped me back before 12. Things were really going smoothly. There was just one problem; he never told me he liked me, infact there was almost no proof asides from us seeing every weekend. He never answered my question each time I asked him this
      ”Do you have a girlfriend”. He also didn’t seem like someone that wanted just sex from me, I felt safe; but then Confused.
“I got you something” Jide said with a warm smile. This was the 4th time we were seeing. It was an iphone 4 and my favorite Perfume; Gucci Guilty. I blushed so hard, of course I was so elated!!!
We went to Bungalows to eat that Saturday night, we went to his house; by then I knew I was sleeping over (it wasn’t because of the iphone and the perfume) but I felt stupid telling Desola I wasn’t coming back to the hostel that night. She called me and bbm-ed me, I didn’t reply any.
We made out that Night, we did everything. Everything asides sex. Yes absolutely everything. The next morning, I got a text message from Desola; “Babe, you should have just told me you were sleeping over at his, You got me worried, anyway hope you’re good, Take care”
I felt like a bad friend…but I really didn’t care so much, Jide was all that was on my mind. He took me to school that Sunday, (WOW, all the way) I then knew that he was in love with me.
I didn’t concentrate in school that week, my friends were beginning to question me, Jide and I couldn’t wait for the weekend, I was stupidly in love already (and it wasn’t because of the iphone and perfume). It was friday already, same routine; this time around I didn’t go to Desolas hostel, we weren’t even talking. He came to pick me from school and we went straight to his house.
“I got you something” He said once again, of course I couldn’t wait to hear what it was. It was a big box, he left me puzzled…
   “Open it” I blushed as I did Gently. CHRISTIAN LOUBOUTIN Gold Stilettos. Infact Let me cut the long story short….
I lost my virginity to him that night.
After the sex, I asked him this “Jide, who am I to you?” Both of us Naked under the duvet, he kissed me and said “As Long As you’re happy, that’s all that matters”
I skipped school that week all because I wanted to be with him. On Monday, he took me to the salon, he bought me this Malaysian hair worth 125thousand naira. On Tuesday, he took me shopping, we went to Mango store at Ikeja City Mall, he said I should pick all I want.
Wednesday, we went to the movies.
Thursday, we went for industry night.
Friday, we went clubbing at Movida. I was Drunk that night (I got myself drunk intentionally). We had sex everyday…sex wasn’t a big deal anymore.
*Deep Sigh* Jide never told me anything about his family, I never met his friends, I wasn’t even sure about his job. I was becoming worried. He gave me the extra keys to his house to take to school, so that anytime I got to Lagos, I could Chill there even when he’s not around.
Speaking of school, I had so many carry-over courses; No summer for me :(
Two months later while in school, I got a text message from a strange number…
     “Hello Ada, I’m not in Nigeria anymore, I’m really sorry this is coming late, it was so urgent. I have business to catch up with, I’ll ttyl. Jide”
My heart melted, I wanted to poo, I was cold, everything was wrong. I called that number; switched off, I called his Naija numbers; all switched off too. I was dead.
I didn’t want to believe Jide had left. On friday, I hurried out of school, I went to his house at Magodo, with the extra keys he gave me of course. There was no trace of Jide in there. I was mortified. The house was empty, with only my clothes and other belongings. I almost ran mad. Jides phone numbers weren’t going through…I had no one to call, my bestfriend Desola and I had parted ways.
Look at what the small note I saw on the dining table read…
    ”Thank you for sharing your life with me. I love the time we spent, I hope you finally find your perfect man. I’ll never forget you. I rented this house you’re staying, the rent is due next month; you have more than 30 days to live in it. FYI; my name isn’t Jide; my name is John; I just came to Nigeria to have fun, I’m sorry this might hurt. Bye”
I opened his timeline; this was his last tweet. “Bitch made my summer wonderful, Bye Nigeria”
I cried Blood.
I went home; My parents house. The next day, I fell sick and was admitted. Nobody knew what was wrong.
I was pregnant.
He deleted his twitter account when I broke the news to him.
I have no information about him, his whereabouts, we don’t even have mutual friends. I started to reminisce on the day I changed my avatar, how my twitter fans started to wash me “Nice avatar” “Adaobi you are beautiful” “Rate this avi, SMASH or PASS” I broke down in tears.
I’m still confused. I don’t even know what to do. I’ve finally come to accept it that I’m carrying a Bastard Baby.


  1. lmao...emma...bu chick??? eyah i feel sorry for her sha

  2. So the girl wrote all this!she has time sha


  4. why did u steal this story tho?

  5. Ahn han u are a thief ooo. It was my fiend dt wrote dis story, n its not even a true story. SMH!!!

  6. Sm people are lovely writers tho. I really enjoyed it.please do a write up on an escapade a lady could have wit three guyz at a time. Lol


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